Do I have to love me ???

The Hebrew Bible has lots of rules to follow, there is the ten commandments, but also many rules in the Old Testament that cover what to plant, and what and when to sacrifice, and tithing and numerous other rules. Rabbis were often asked to interpret these rules.

Rules help us,
when we follow the road rules,

we all drive on the same side of the road,
we know to stop at a red light,
we know to slow down in school zones.

What happens when we don’t follow the road rules? We can get fined and maybe lose our licence, but not following the rules means we are more likely to be involved in a  collision, to hurt ourselves or other people. Rules are there so we can share the road with other traffic and people, and stay safe.

In the same way, rules in the Bible are a framework for living together, not something to tie us in knots.

The Scribe asks Jesus what is the most important of the rules; and he responds:

“The most important one is this: ‘Listen, Israel! The Lord our God is the only Lord. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second most important commandment is this: ‘Love your neighbour as you love yourself.’ There is no other commandment more important than these two.” [Good News version]

He doesn’t speak of tithing, or sexuality, or what clothes to wear, or how to worship, or what structure the church should follow. Jesus speaks about loving God and loving neighbour.

Relationship and community.

Being able to quote these two commandments is one thing, but what might it look like for us to live them out?

The greatest commandment - Loving God with all out heart, soul, mind and strength. What might loving God look like? The scribe agrees with Jesus’ answer, and continues on that these two commandments are more important than burnt offerings and sacrifice - remember this was a time when ritual and sacrifice was considered very important, more important than how you treated people.

This is a reminder that loving God is not shown in burnt offerings, or these days we might say in an abundance of good works or giving to charity or pious living. We are called to love God with all that we are, with our whole being, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. ‘Listen O Israel, the Lord our God is the only Lord’ – not Caesar, not money, not our reputation.

What are the factors in our decision making:

about our food
where we live
our work

Loving God with all that we are may not be simple, but loving your neighbour as yourself, doesn’t sound simple either.

I remember early in my time as a Christian being told that I was at the end of the list,

J O Y,

Jesus first,
yourself last and
others in between,
there was even a song about it.

Yet, Jesus is saying that the second most important commandment is loving our neighbour, the person who is in need, in the same way that we love our self.  One person explained this by thinking about it like the oxygen masks on an airplane: the instructions are to ‘“attach your mask first before assisting others.” The point is clear: If I do not take care of myself, I cannot take care of others. If I do not love myself, I cannot love others.’ [Seasons of the Spirit]

Love neighbour as we love ourselves – not as much as, or more than, but in the same way as we love ourselves.

While some people are better at loving themselves than their neighbour, others are very poor at loving self.

We need to love our self, which can be difficult for many of us, because if we don’t love ourselves, how can we love others? This doesn’t mean thinking we are better than others, or that we never get anything wrong, but it does mean recognising and valuing the person that God has made you.

For example, I will generally give people the benefit of the doubt, most people do the best they can given their life situation. BUT I don’t always give myself the same generosity. Sooner or later I get resentful, because I am giving myself a hard time, so I end up getting annoyed with people.

I need to allow myself to be human,

amazing yet imperfect,
chaotic and creative

Loving our neighbour includes living in ways that do not exploit people. In Biblical times this meant leaving grain for people to glean, which you can read more about in the Ruth story;

not oppressing your workers;
not discriminating against the disabled;
not speaking falsely about people.

Loving our neighbours seems to me to be about living in ways that offer life to all people, the fullness of life that Jesus speaks about.  

We love because God first loved us.

If we can’t /don’t love our self, can we really love our neighbour, or are we acting out of duty?

I know some of you are thinking –

but I am not lovable!

If you only knew what I was really like!

If you knew half of what I have done!

Well God knows what you are really like, and God loves you.

Not lovable? God disagrees, God loves you. Even though you can be a horrible, grumpy, rude …… [fill in your own blanks] person, God loves you.

Some years ago at a camp, I received a Placemat that has a picture and the words: God don’t make no junk!

We love because God first loved us

Love God with all that we are

Love ourselves, accept our dignity and humanity.

Love our neighbour, the one in need.

What would need to change for you to love yourself?

What would your life look like?